Choice Corporate Housing Inc

By Sanjay Johari

We all have our area of influence in the society. This is that part of the society with which we interact intentionally or otherwise. Within this area of influence our standing or performance in the society is indicated by how other people accept us – how many and what types of friends we have; how many subscribers, leads, customers, critics, well-wishers we have and are able to retain. A national leader will have entire country in his area of influence. Of course, it is up to each of us to determine our area of influence, but how other people behave with us is an indicator of our social performance much like the scoreboard in sports that indicates the performance of the teams and players participating in the game.

Let us put this concept in a statement:

Statement No. 1 : Behavior of other people determines and indicates our performance in the society.

Now, how do people behave with us? Why do they behave in a particular way? Why do people want to subscribe to one newsletter in large numbers and are reluctant to subscribe to another? How are some people able to pull in lot of customers while others are not so successful?

The fact of the matter is that WE teach others to behave with us. WE tell other people how they should treat us, how they should respond to our gesture, whether they should trust us, ignore us, or get rid of us. In all our communications we reveal something of ourselves, we allow them to make judgment about us. This is true of all means of communication we may choose to adopt – face-to-face interaction using verbal communication with body language, thru internet, thru printed message or any other. It is ultimately thru our own behavior that we invite people to deal with us as it suits them.

Statement No. 2: Behavior of other people towards us is influenced by our own behavior.

I would like to add a note on unintentional interaction I had mentioned earlier. Let us take an imaginary, but quite common situation. I am traveling in a bus and a gentleman is sitting by my side. Both of us have chosen to remain confined to our places until the end of the journey. I cannot help noticing the gentleman and forming some opinion about him. He has already influenced my thoughts without uttering a single word. He will also notice me and both of us will “know” that we have noticed each other. A silent communication has been established between us. At this stage both of us have the opportunity to make friends, promote ourselves, our expertise, our products. In real life situation we come across hundreds of occasions where we establish communication with others without resorting to any visible interaction.

Let us now join Statements 1 and 2 and we arrive at:

Statement No. 3 : Our behavior determines our social performance.

Please note that after combining the first two statements, the factor “behavior of other people” is totally eliminated. What remains is our behavior leading to our own social performance.

We influence how people decide to deal with us, but what do people see or perceive in our behavior that compels them to take a particular stand? People are undoubtedly influenced by their own belief system as much as by our behavior. Thru our behavior they are able to assess our confidence, our conviction, our self-image. The impression we have about ourselves is revealed thru our communication – written, verbal or any other type.

Statement 4: Our self image determines our behavior.

We can now combine all the statements and arrive at the concluding one:

Statement 5: Our self image decides our social performance.

Now we know where to attack if we want to improve our social performance, have more customers, become better internet marketers.

Before we approach our prospective customers, we need to convince ourselves that the product we are offering has the merit. It is necessary to gain confidence in the product and in ourselves to the extent of being truly enthusiastic and excited about it. We should first build up confidence in the product and in ourselves, only then we should attempt to market it.

Our communication will transmit our excitement and enthusiasm. It will show our confidence in the product and our confidence will act as guarantor. With right preparation, right attitude, and positive frame of mind we approach with confidence, get favorable response and gain the power to change the world.

By Inna Nirenburg

What are you thinking - right now? “I’m reading your article!” you say. Well, take a little bit of a closer look. What’s spinning in the back of your mind? Is it that big deadline that’s looming at the end of the week? Or how you’re going to deal with your mother-in-law this weekend? Or maybe you’re worrying about your finances?

Are you even aware of the thoughts going through your head right now? What about… now?

Some Bad News From the Thought Police

Scientists estimate that an average person will think at a rate of roughly between 1 and 4 thoughts per second while awake. That’s well over 60,000 thoughts during a typical day! And, of all this jabbering going on in your head, it’s estimated that you’ve thought over 95% of your thoughts before. So, not only is your mind generally on a constant hamster wheel, but it’s also doing this spinning continuously, unproductively - and unoriginally.

The Power Between Your Ears - It’s Not What You Think

Enough bad news? Ok - now here’s the other side of the story. You have within you the greatest, simplest, and most powerful tool imaginable. It can lead you to great prosperity, joy, and fulfillment - or it can drop you instantly into the depths of despair and negativity.

No, I’m not talking simply about the power of thought - not even a fraction of those thousands of stale, repeat thoughts running through your head right now will be of much use to you. (Trust me; nope, not even the one wondering for the tenth time whether you turned the stove off this morning). But what is powerful is where you put your attention within all this clatter.

Mr. Webster Says:

“Attention: Concentration of the mental powers; a close or careful observing or listening”. So how does that apply to you? “Concentration of the mental powers” - all too often, we give away the concentration part of our attention to things utterly undeserving. Thoughts of worry, negative predictions, minor irritations, and daily minutiae are hardly productive, and take up too much room in your head.

And this leaves very little space for the second, critical, aspect of attention: “a close or careful observing or listening”. We, as a culture, don’t like to sit back and listen. We prefer to be constantly inundated with forceful messages which grab our attention and don’t let go. We too often forget to sit back and actually listen to the small voice of intuition. You know, the one that already has the answers that we’re trying so hard to figure out.

Try It Now

Give it a shot. Really. Stop for a minute, and focus actively on your thoughts - concentrate. What are you thinking? You know, that quiet and incessant little buzz behind your eyes; that unsettled feeling - what’s behind that? Now shift your attention to listening, see if there’s a message waiting for you. Just below the surface, what is it saying? Listen… You’re now learning to distinguish the noise of your mind from the voice of your intuition, your inner knowing - all through the tool of attention.

You Are Not Your Thoughts

There’s huge power in putting your attention actively on your thoughts. This helps you to separate the you from the thought. You are not your thoughts, you are having thoughts, they are passing through your head. You are bigger than your thoughts, and you can choose whether or not you want to give them power. And you do this by either giving them your attention, or by allowing them to just float on by.

Head and Heart

And it’s not just thoughts that you can focus your attention on. As cognitive psychologists and holistic healers have known for years, emotions and thoughts are deeply intertwined. One influences the other, and both influence your physical biochemistry. So learning to actively focus your attention on the thoughts and feelings you want, while letting go of those you don’t want, could be the best thing you’ll ever do for your health, your well being, and your happiness.